Coming to America

We made it home! After seemingly endless flying, we all made it in one piece.

Our amazing families met us on the other side of the flight. We are very happy to be home.

Little man heading out to his ride home. 

Before take-off. 

Arrival in DTW with our new US citizen. 

Max is not so sure of what to make of the weather. 

Celebrating with our families!

Goodbye China!

A few photos from our last day in China. Saying goodbye to our very large travel groups. 

Travel Groups 2136, 2137, 2138.
17 children with families!

New kiddos in group 2137

God Bless the USA

Consulate Day.

It's a big day for international adoptive parents. In order for our children to become US citizens, lots of paperwork, phone calls, emails and waiting for approvals go into this. Much of our wait time leading up to traveling for Max is immigration related. This culminates in the US consulate appointment in-country (in Guangzhou for China adoptions).  (If you are wondering if our opinions on immigration have been influenced by this, yes, they have.  A US passport is one of the most valuable commodities on Earth.  It really is ok to be required to jump through a few hoops...)

There is something heart-swelling as you approach the building with The Great Seal of the United States of America emblazoned on the outside. Maybe it's because it's home. Maybe it's seeing the long long line of people waiting outside, hoping to go in, and walking past them to the US citizen line with your child. Maybe it's gosh darn patriotism.

Decked out in red,white and blue to head to the consulate!

I may be modeling my Chinese garb but here I come America! 

Yes, that is belly busting through. 

Extra Towels

After (barely) making it to Guangzhou, we settled into our hotel and readied ourself for the US side of things.   In between the medical appointment and waiting for our Consulate Appointment (Wed), we have had some adventures.

Chris and I have a lot to learn about parenting two children. Unfortunately, poor time management let to poop-amageddon yesterday. I first dried Max and then was working on Maddy. In the meantime, Max began to poop on the floor. (Seriously, like 1 minute after setting him down.) Proud of myself, I thought I had it handled while Chris showered, moved the little guy, cleaned up and cleaned him. I had not turned around to answer a question for Maddy and all poop broke loose. I'm trying to grab Max and get him back to the shower, while shouting "Maddy, save yourself! Get on the bed!"  I did not see the handful of poop which went firmly onto Daddy's back, who showered him off. This was noted when Chris got out of the shower and said " Is there something on my back?". Um…yeah. If you've ever seen Chris change a dirty diaper, multiply that face by 100 and that's what we had.  And I was no help since my vision was blurred by the tears from laughing so hard.

To avoid things getting boring, Max decided to hit the mini-bar. While arguing with this big sister over a mini bottle of Jack Daniels- who was trying to do the right thing and take it from her brother- he bit her. Big chomp to the finger. Serious tears from Maddy followed by serious tears from Max who does not like being told no.

Scenes like this could be why we get extra towels. The poor housekeeper came to clean the room at one of several instances when I was holding both children who were crying. After laughing at me, she brought extra towels. And they've arrived every day since. We are a show. You can decide what kind of show. I have my own adjective.

The pictures below are happier times, which thankfully, predominate. Both of our children are overall happy kids, love hugs and while working on adjusting to each other, are doing ok with each other.  (Most of the time) Maddy is a great big sister and Max even returned her toy to her this afternoon.
In our downtime, between our craziness,we have been to the pool a few times.  Max is taking to the water really well.  I'm pretty sure he's a future Olympian.

Lookin' good, buddy.

Just before he started his breast stroke. 

Go Royals! 

I couldn't help but think of my dad at the pearl market. Every one of those floors are whole sale jewels. Bargaining + jewelry= Ron's heaven. 

Our nice group meal out.  I think the wait staff was happy to see us leave. 

Seeing the sites

In a need to get out of the hotel room, we headed out with our group for a tour.  These were some of the same sites we saw in 2012 with our tiny girl. It was fun to be back with our not-as-tiny girl and the little man. While I tried to engage them in questions about the architecture, they both only cared about roaming around and "riding" the cement sculptures. Interestingly, Maddy's imaginary dogs, Lulu and Butch, took the shape of small foo dogs. That's right, we now have multi-cultural imaginary pets. 

Someone is NOT excited about the sites. 

Buddist temple. It was Sunday morning. I decided it wasn't the time to discuss monotheism vs polytheism. Instead, we focused on the banyan trees and incense. 

Maddy's friend Brady, the brother of Max's roommate, Paul from SHH. These two have been buddies. 

Enjoying tea with the locals. Of note- he did not get sick. 

Remember this? 2012

Same place (different angle) 2014

Riding a foo dog named Butch.

Saying good-bye in Zhengzhou

Just a followup to Chris's last post.

We were blessed to have Yisha as our guide again in Zhengzhou. she was the same guide who was with us during our adoption of Maddy. The lovely woman who we called in a panic wondering if we wake the baby to feed her or let her sleep.

We like to think we're more experienced now. Yisha probably has a different opinion but if so,  she kept quiet.

Yisha and Tina, our guides in Zhengzhou 2014

One Step Closer...

To home.

We are in Guangzhou (Canton in the English-speaking world) for the final leg of the trip.  Max now has a Chinese passport and so our work in Zhengzhou was complete.  Yesterday we had a very tiring day of travel to get to Guangzhou, where we will take little man to the US consulate later this week.

A few thoughts as we left Zhengzhou (remember that this blog is not merely written for entertainment, but also so our kids can get a small glimpse into life when they were united with us).  Zhengzhou is a neat city - it is Maddy's 'hometown' and the capital of the Province that gave us Max, as well.  That being said, Zhengzhou is an industrial city. There is a lot of 'heavy industry' there, and this contributes to some pretty poor air quality.  Flying into Zhengzhou is literally a descent into a fog, which is how it feels being there.  This is a city of 8 million people with Walmart, KFC, Subway, BK, McDonalds, Pizza Hut, and Starbucks but this is not at all a Western city.  The people of Zhengzhou stare quite a lot because foreigners are not common there. They are very nice when they figure out what we are doing (thanks to the handy cards that we wear around our necks that explain in Chinese and English that we are coming to adopt this child 'as our own'), but this city will always be a 'hard' city for our family.  It is here that we received our children, both of whom were taken from loving environments in order to be placed into our arms.  For Max, he literally woke up at his healing home, was plopped in a van at 0530, and handed to strange-looking strangers at 1030.  I do not know many adults that would handle that well.  He spent the first 48h being rather quiet and congenial - opening his arms and running to basically anyone.  Then the grieving started.  He spent the last two days being just shy of inconsolable.  His sleep is disturbed and he really hated being in our hotel room the last two days in Zhengzhou.  Did I mention that we have a four-year old on the trip, too?  She has actually been quite a champ through it all, with only some episodic selective hearing.  They say that the child has to be comfortable enough with you to allow the grieving to begin, which should mean this is a good sign. Still, it is hard to listen to a scared little boy cry out 'MAMA' and know that he is thinking of anyone but the two of you.

The point of all of this is that leaving Zhengzhou with our new child is - to Sarah and me - momentous. It is their first time in an airplane, they have been formally adopted, and the plane literally rises out of the fog of Henan province to begin their journey 'home'.  They may not know it at the time, but that flight out really means something.  It is the closing of one chapter of life - a chapter that was bookended by pain (the loss of parents and abandonment at the beginning - and the loss of the only home they have ever known at the end) - and the start of the next chapter.  I like to think the next chapter starts with that bright blue sky that you can only see at 35000 feet. No pollution. No fog.  There are plenty of bumps ahead, but this is the first step towards some type of permanence in their lives.  The flight ends in Guangzhou - a city in the sub-tropics of about 12 million people.  By area it is the 2nd larges city in China (behind Beijing), and by population is is #5. The air here is considerably cleaner (though not as clean as Lawrence, KS … 'far above the golden valley, glorious to view…'), and the city has more flowers and trees.  The trip to Guangzhou was a real turning point for Maddy.  Sounds rosy, huh?  So what did Max think of all of this?

This is how yesterday felt for Max's parents:

Turns out that my little man does not like to be confined while awake.  Maddy had a psychotic meltdown two years ago on the way to the airport. Max had to sleep on the way so that he could save up some energy for the fit he would throw in seat 44C of the Boeing 737 tasked with flying us out of the haze.  Many looks from fellow passengers, food offered by the flight attendants and suckers from other adoptive parents ensued.  Did I mention that the plane had not yet taxied onto the runway? The safety video had not commenced?  I couldn't remember if I had mentioned that part…I can think of things that I fear more than this coming Friday - 2h flight, 5h layover, 13.5h flight - but not many.

I have always liked multiple choice tests.  The answer is right there in front of you, masked only by three to four pretenders. You can usually eliminate one to two quickly and leave yourself with - at worst - a 50/50 shot. I think the best way to sum up the last few days is in 'quiz format'. In that spirit:

1. Our group of 6 adults and 11 children was given this private room near the kitchen of a Zhengzhou restaurant because of:

1. The extraordinary gratitude of the Provincial Chinese Government at our adoption of these wonderful children
2. The well-known desire of American families to eat soft-shelled turtle in privacy
3. The look of horror on the faces of those locals occupying the main dining room upon our arrival in the entryway
4. Our culturally appropriate attire and behavior

2. The beverage seen in the picture above represents:

1. The official Chinese beer of the NBA
2. Chinese Natural Light
3. The Champagne of Chinese beers
4. Fatherly attempts to numb the pain of parenthood
5. more than one of the above

3. The shoes above were purchased in Asia by two Caucasian adults. They were purchased as 'little driving mocs'. Upon closer inspection, they most likely represent:

1. Papal slippers
2. The footwear of Mexican drug-lords
3. House slippers for upper level Chinese Mafia Dons
4. a sneak peak at the GapKids Spring 2015 catalog

4. My son is attempting to use sign language in an attempt to bridge the cultural divide. This is the sign for:

1. I would like a hug
2. I am about to scream so loud the Captain will think a sheep is being murdered
3. Take cover, for I am about to head-butt the $hit out of you
4. Tell the guy across the aisle in 44D that his eyewear is unoriginal 

***as an aside, the little tank pictured above is trying to fall asleep right now but the China Marriott is having a pool party 10 floors below and playing????….you guessed it, Gangnam Style.  You seriously cannot make this up***

5. Madelyn, pictured above, has just finished traveling with the subject of the previous question.  This behavior represents:

1. Mind-numbing exhaustion. She believed it was moisturizer
2. The completion of her transformation into the Joker
3. A beautiful attempt to be like mommy
4. The first time dad laughed in about 9 hours

6. You have recently finished a long day of travel and open up a checked bag to find some chocolate. A fine white powder explodes at you from the zipper of the bag as it is opened. What has just happened?

1. A Coke-blizzard -- you are lucky they don't have drug-sniffing dogs in Guangzhou
2. Terrorists mistook your bag for that of POTUS and stuffed it with enough Anthrax to wipe the perma-smile off Joseph R. Biden
3. Powdered Chinese baby formula blew up during the flight
4. It does not matter. There are two boxes of chocolate down there and your sole mission in life at this point is to eat whatever does not eat you first

Thank you for completing this short quiz. Tomorrow is a medical exam for Max.  Hopefully we will leave without swindling a toy as our Madelyn did 2 years ago…

I didn't do it. Nobody saw me do it. You can't prove anything.

Good night/day.

cr

The Yankees Are Coming…..

….and they are riding in on a washed up amusement park ride:

I received some pretty interesting looks from old Chinese men casually walking in the park and listening to the joyous laughter of children until….SCREECH…why is a big American riding that hideous thing??  You would have thought I was leading a charge of invaders.  As you can see, this is one of Maddy's favorite parts of China.  Odds are favorable that I ride this again tomorrow.

Today was a day of 'amusement' for most everyone on the trip.  Our official duties in Zhengzhou are finished. We are sitting around waiting for a passport for our little man.  Should be here tomorrow and then we leave for Guangzhou on Saturday.  This morning we took the optional tour to a local aquarium.  Maddy does not like aquariums. We just found this out. I got in a nice workout carrying her in one arm and her stroller in the other up and down 3 flights of steps.  You are probably thinking there was some large and scary fish there….nope.  The small waterfall at the entrance just did her in.  Falling water. Terrified grasping at me as if the devil himself is playing tug-of-war on the other end.  Her baby brother?  He was rather unfazed.  Did not seem to care much one way or the other.  All the poor girl wanted to see was a few penguins, and we did find a few at the end so it was all [kinda] worth it.

Naps followed and then a brief sojourn to the park.  Nothing exciting to report.

One fun fact for the day:

Our guide was explaining high school in China. Her daughter is in school and trying to get into an American university.  She is in school from 7a -1130a. She then has 1.5 hours for lunch, which is waiting for her because she also needs to take a nap. She goes back to school from 1-5p and then again from 6-930p. 

They go to school 6 days per week and the parents were just informed that they will be having 3.5h Sunday afternoon sessions to make up for recent holidays.  I told her to just get her daughter into school over here and it will be a comparatively easy road.  They are renting an apartment next to her school because that is the only way they will see her - if she comes home for lunch.  The students are asked to memorize 200 new English words PER DAY.  Nuts.

Falling asleep at the wheel here, so that is all for now.  Will try and get some pictures tomorrow. Another free day and packing for the next leg of trip. Flight Saturday AM.

c

Free Day!

Today was a free day in Zhengzhou since our trip to Max's home city was yesterday. This led to a Team Roark outing which is an adventure unto itself.  We were just soakin' up the sites and sounds of Zhengzhou.

Highlights include:

- Shoe shopping. Max and Maddy have new kicks and our sales lady has a picture of funny white people.

- Wal-Mart, China Style. Yes, Maddy, those are fish. No, they are not for an aquarium, they are for dinner.

-Mall squatty potty. Maddy is officially terrified to potty in China. And so is Chris who had the misfortune to take her.

- The new Britax model in the first picture. Where can I pick of some of these?

Yes, stare at me because my kids are not bundled in 80 degrees.  But call this a child seat. 

Out to dinner with travel friends!

Maddy and her new friend E, who now has a Mommy and Daddy. 

This kid is all boy. He immediately knew how to turn on the remote. He stands in from of the mini-fridge with the door open. And tonight comes to me with a snickers and sprite. 

21 months going on 21 years?

Is this not the snack you were talking about?

Big sister action. "Max! Take a picture with me!"

Thank the Lord! The boy sleeps. 

He is Ours

Yesterday was a very long and busy day for us.  Maddy was awake at 3am, which meant that mom and dad were also awake about 30 seconds later.  Thankfully, little man slept until about 530a, which is normal for him anyway. We went down for breakfast at the hotel and the buffet was certainly more 'lively' today, with 16 extra children in various states of decompensating  behavior.  Max hammered down some Congee (weird rice thing) and fried rice, which was a relief because he did not eat very much on Gotcha Day.  He was doing great until he threw a spoon on the ground and we made the seminal mistake of laughing.  This began a small chorus of sounds with Max and a nearby little girl throwing everything they could reach on the ground.  Some stern looks from the staff followed as we quickly cleared a 2' area around Max of any item that could be thrown - akin to the Demilitarized Zone between the Koreas.

Next was a bus trip back to the government center to finalize the adoption.  On gotcha day the child is not actually yours. You sign a temporary guardianship agreement and have 24 hours to hang out with them and make sure everything is ok. On this day you go back and sign the agreement that finalizes, in the eyes of the Chinese government, the adoption.  He's pretty cool, so we figure we'll take him!

***as an aside he just woke up smiling, got up, ran across the bed and before I could get up he fell forward and smashed his head into his crib.  Quick recovery, though.  Lookin' good buddy***

Maddy is overwhelmed with joy at the addition of Max to our family.

After this picture was taken we drove to a public notary office so that everything could be notarized in preparation for our afternoon jaunt to Pingdingshan - Max's hometown - and the Peoples Center for Something Something Exit Entry Public Safety Something Something to apply for a passport for little man.

If you followed the blog during Maddy's adoption trip, you may remember the day that we went to the 'Chinese DMV' place in order to apply for her passport. We were pulled into a back room by some low-level administrator for questioning about why we would adopt a Chinese orphan. During this time, Maddy threw food and made a foul little number in her diaper that needed to be changed.  This is that day for Max.  

Give me something. Anything. Now.

Small room at the notary office. 6th floor. No elevator. Fun walk.

Is she doing the robot...

…or just walking like an Egyptian?

Maddy scaring the locals.

The Pingdingshan orphanage director. 

Some small differences between the two days.  Maddy was from Zhengzhou (the city where we are staying), and so we only had to drive about 10 minutes and there were three other families with us.  Pingdingshan is a two-hour drive from Zhengzhou.  Nothing like Chinese highways for two hours with your children NOT in car seats because that doesn't make us nervous or anything.  Max slept the entire ride there and Maddy watched cartoons on the iPad.  I could draw this out, but the honest truth is that it went fine.  We drove two hours and then were only at the government center for about 20 minutes in total. We then climbed back in the van and drove back. We were stuck in Zhengzhou traffic for about an hour, which was not fun.

Today is a free day. Will try to stir up some fun. No more official duties for us until next week in Guangzhou.